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When You Know Something Isn't Right: Learning to Trust Your Mother's Intuition

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Thu, 27 Aug 2026 15:05:14 GMT

Have you ever felt like something was wrong, but everyone said your child is fine?

Have you ever felt it in your gut? That quiet, persistent whisper telling you that something isn’t right, even while the world—and the experts—tell you that everything is fine?

For many of us as parents, that instinct isn’t just a feeling; it’s an alarm bell. When my third child, Olivia, was born, I knew. I knew from day one that something was different.

Being a mother of two already, it wasn’t my first rodeo. I knew what to expect. But Olivia wasn't following the script. She didn't pass meconium until day three. She struggled with jaundice, and even after being sent home, we were sent back to the hospital because her bilirubin levels spiked again.

It felt like a series of "normal" hurdles, but the struggle didn't stop there. She wouldn’t latch. She cried and threw up after almost every feed. She couldn’t transition to a crib, and needed to be swaddled but hated sensory stimulation. She cried in the bath, in the car—there were no "parenting hacks" in my toolbox that could calm her.

By the time she was four months old, she wasn’t gaining weight. My life became a revolving door of weekly weigh-ins at the Paediatrician’s office. She was put on reflux medication, but she fought the syringe, coughing it back up. She refused soothers and wouldn’t take a bottle. I was a shell of a person—sleep-deprived, terrified, and drowning in guilt, trying to balance her needs with the needs of my other two small children.

The breaking point was a three-hour window where I left Olivia with her dad. I pumped breastmilk for him to give her in the bottle. She cried the entire time. The milk just pooled in her mouth; she couldn't seem to wrap her tongue around the bottle. We tried every bottle on the market—even the ones stated as "colic-proof." Nothing worked.

We were referred to an Occupational Therapist, who looked at me and said she had never seen a baby like this before. That became the theme of Olivia’s life: she was constantly the pioneer, the first patient to present with issues no one had seen before.

I remember crying on the phone with the OT, desperate, knowing Olivia had lost weight again. She told me to get to the hospital that day. At Brantford General Hospital, they placed an NG tube to keep her stable. The nurses told me to leave the room because she "could smell me," and to pump so Corey could feed her. It took two days for them to understand that this wasn't a "mommy-attachment" issue; it was a physical reality we had been living for five months.

When we were transferred to McMaster Children’s Hospital, the disbelief continued. They didn't think her reflux was "that bad" until they increased the speed on her feed pump. She proved them wrong, projectile vomiting all over the room, the interns, and the bed. She was tiny, but she had the strength of a dragon when it came to her reflux.

And then came the moment that still makes my blood boil. The medical team suggested this was a "learned behavior." They actually hypothesized that a six-month-old was choosing not to drink from a bottle just to be difficult. As someone with training in Child Development and Psychology, I knew this was absurd. A baby doesn't resist the necessity of life to get their way. I refused to let that narrative continue.

She was given a "Failure to Thrive" diagnosis—a clinical label that offered no answers, only a confirmation of what I already knew: she couldn't survive without the NG tube. This is when we decided that the NG tube wasn't going to be temporary and she needed a more sustainable way to get nutrition. In August 2012 Olivia had surgery to have a G-tube placed in her stomach that directly connected to the feed pump. This was her first major surgery, but we knew that it would allow her to have more independence and we would be able to go home once she was stabilized. The NG tube was too fragile for her to leave the hospital as she would consistently pull it out and it would need to be re-inserted by a Nurse for the next feed.

The turning point finally came in October. The genetics team was finally referred, and we received the diagnosis of 1 Q 21.1 micro-deletion.

The relief was instant. I didn't care about the name of the diagnosis; I just needed an answer. I needed to know that I wasn’t crazy, that I wasn’t "overreacting," and that I wasn't just an overprotective mother. My Mother's Intuition was real, and it guided me to ensure that the team knew that I was the expert to my baby and my voice deserved to be heard. I had to keep believing in myself, even when I felt like I was losing my mind. I knew my baby in a way nobody else did. I knew she was in pain, and I knew she wasn’t a "bad baby." I didn't stop until we had an answer.

Getting an answer was just the beginning of our story. Now we knew why she wasn't thriving, but the hard work and sleepless nights continued as having a diagnosis is just one piece of the puzzle. We continued to work with OT, Physiotherapists, Speech Therapists, Behaviour Therapists, Dieticians, Psychotherapists, along with a whole team of specialists through McMaster Children's Hospital.

If you are out there right now, fighting to be heard, trust your gut. You are the expert on your child. Keep pushing, keep searching, and keep advocating. You aren't imagining the struggle. You are not invisible and neither is your child. Sometimes it feels like you are on an uphill battle and nobody believes in you. It took me a long time to give myself the acknowledgment and credit for trusting my gut—for knowing, against all the noise and medical dismissal, that my child wasn't just 'fine,' but that she was fighting a battle no one else could see.

Come along for the journey—listen, watch, and grow with me wherever you get your podcasts. Like & subscribe to join the IV League—where you’re not just a listener, you’re part of the story we’re building together.

The importance of sharing your story- you are not alone!

Building Connections that Matter; lessons from my Networking Journey

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Sun, 02 Aug 2026 23:49:56 GMT

Networking is often viewed as collecting business cards, growing LinkedIn connections, or searching for the next opportunity. Through my experiences, I have come to understand that meaningful networking is about building authentic relationships based on trust, support, and shared purpose. In today's competitive digital marketing landscape, genuine connections can lead to mentorship, collaboration, career opportunities, and long-term professional growth.

Why Networking Matters

Networking allows professionals to exchange ideas, learn from one another, and create opportunities that may not exist through traditional job applications. In digital marketing, where collaboration and continuous learning are essential, a strong professional network provides valuable insights, industry knowledge, and lasting relationships.

My Experience at the Regulated Entrepreneur Retreat

Recently, I attended the Regulated Entrepreneur Retreat expecting to learn new business strategies and marketing techniques. Instead, I experienced something much more impactful: a community of women who openly shared both their successes and challenges. I walked into the retreat knowing very few people and quickly realized that authentic conversations created stronger connections than trying to 'network.' The experience reminded me that business can feel lonely, but it doesn't have to. Supporting others in the same industry is not a threat to success—it strengthens the entire community. There is space for all of us to succeed together.

Three Networking Strategies I'm Taking Forward

Intentional Presence: Rather than attending events simply to collect contacts, I will seek opportunities to listen, ask thoughtful questions, and build meaningful conversations at industry events, seminars, and networking sessions.
Collaboration Over Competition: I will actively look for opportunities to collaborate with peers, share resources, and celebrate others' successes, believing that strong professional communities benefit everyone.
Vulnerable Connection: Showing up authentically, sharing challenges when appropriate, and offering support builds trust and creates stronger professional relationships than presenting a perfect image.

Three Tips I'd Give Other Students

Find Your People: Seek communities, workshops, conferences, and networking events that align with your values and interests.
Be the Support: Approach networking by asking how you can help others before asking what they can do for you.
Regulate to Connect: Take care of your wellbeing so you can be fully present. Authentic relationships are easier to build when you are grounded and engaged.

Final Thoughts

As I continue my journey in digital marketing, I hope to build a network that values collaboration over competition and supports one another's growth. The connections we make today have the potential to shape not only our careers but also the communities we create.

This experience reinforced that the strongest professional relationships are built on trust, authenticity, and shared purpose—values I hope to bring into my future career in digital marketing and content strategy.

Continue the Conversation

If you're interested in authentic conversations about caregiving, resilience, and building meaningful connections, I invite you to explore my podcast, Invisibly Visible. Listen, watch, and join the community as we continue learning and growing together.

The Invisible impact caregiving takes on your relationship

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Tue, 14 Jul 2026 20:11:23 GMT

No one prepares you for how much a diagnosis can affect your relationship. Between appointments, sleepless nights, paperwork, and the emotional weight of advocating for your child, it's easy to loose sight of each other.

When you’re in the thick of it, it’s hard to imagine that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Twenty years of marriage have given Corey and I plenty of "you can't make this stuff up" moments, as well as some beautiful, joyful and inspiring ones.

There was a season where we were living the absolute grit and grind of daily survival. It was a blur of Corey working nights, I was essentially "living" in the hospital, and navigating a level of sleep deprivation that makes you question your own sanity. With three young children, and the crushing stress of the hospital environment weighing on us, it felt like we were constantly on the edge. Our strategy became one of survival: divide and conquer. We had to be a tag team just to make it through the next 24 hours.

But survival is just the first step. To keep our marriage alive, we had to be intentional. We learned that we had to communicate every single day—no matter how exhausted we were. We made sure to carve out that space to decompress, creating a safe harbour where we could share our fears, our worries, and our concerns without judgment. We realized that marriage is a choice you make every single day. We had to make it a priority, grounded in gratitude for one another. Most importantly, we learned the golden rule of our partnership: we couldn't both give up at the same time.

In our latest episode, Hard Stuff Corey and I pull back the curtain on that time. We share the raw, honest truth about how we processed that trauma and found our way back to each other.

Click here to read Episode 1 Hard Stuff Show Notes

“Come along for the journey—listen, watch, and grow with me wherever you get your podcasts. Like & subscribe to join the IV League—where you’re not just a listener, you’re part of the story we’re building together.”

RESOURCES AND IDEAS

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Mon, 06 Jul 2026 17:40:25 GMT

Parent Support:

https://www.parentsupportnetwork.ca/

https://www.autismontario.com/cares

https://ontariocaregiver.ca/?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23643219256&gbraid=0AAAAACVF8S2YMgzxmG9AS5sIvVo11x9mt&gclid=CjwKCAjwpK3SBhASEiwAtV1SPFaW99Kb-HLRkHTTOWnY-zKPdfzEEyJydbyH8fuzz4iQsTOVqOIgjBoCPWsQAvD_BwE

https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/child-infant-health/supports-programs-pregnancy/nobody-perfect-parenting-sheets.html

https://childmind.org/positiveparenting/parent-self-care/

https://www.niagararegion.ca/parents/

https://www.triplep.net/glo-en/the-triple-p-system-at-work/training-and-delivery/resources/

Self Care:

https://smho-smso.ca/online-resources/caring-for-yourself-while-caring-for-others/

https://www.sickkidsfoundation.com/aboutus/newsandmedia/stories_july2021_akhselfcare

https://blog.ab.bluecross.ca/wellness/self-care-for-parents/

Re-thinking 'red flags': Moving from fear to connection

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Fri, 03 Jul 2026 17:10:51 GMT

Disclaimer: I am not a licensed medical professional. The information provided below is a synthesis of guidelines taken from government-approved Canadian resources and is intended for informational purposes only. Please always consult with your Paediatrician or healthcare provider regarding any concerns about your child’s health or development.

We’ve all been there—scrolling through a developmental checklist and feeling our hearts race as we compare our child to a set of rigid expectations. The medical community often uses the term "red flags" to describe early signs that a child might need extra support. But let’s be honest: for a parent already navigating the complexities of raising a child with unique needs, that term creates immense, unnecessary anxiety. It feels like a siren warning that something is "wrong."

Language matters. When we label developmental variations as "red flags," we inadvertently imply that the child is broken or that we, as parents, have missed something vital. This fuels the "Mom guilt" we know all too well and separates us from the sense of partnership we need with our medical providers.

Instead, I prefer to view these milestones as invitations for support. They aren't judgments; they are simply cues that let us know where our child might need a little extra help, a different approach, or a specific type of resource. When we shift our language to be more inclusive, supportive, and encouraging, we turn the act of "checking" into an act of advocacy. We are not looking for flaws; we are looking for ways to better support our children’s unique and remarkable growth.

Here is a supportive guide to what to watch for—not with fear, but with curiosity—as your child grows.

0-3 Months: The Beginning of Connection

During these early months, development is largely about engagement and responsiveness. You are looking for cues that your baby is connecting with their environment.

What to observe: Does your baby make eye contact? Do they startle at loud noises? Can they lift their head while on their tummy?
The Supportive Perspective: If you notice they aren't quite engaging or seem overly rigid, it’s not a failure on your part. It is simply an invitation to ask your doctor about their sensory or motor development.

3-6 Months: Rolling and Reaching

This stage is about intentional movement and deepening social bonds.

What to observe: Is your baby starting to roll over? Are they reaching for toys or your hands? Do they smile back when you talk to them?
The Supportive Perspective: Every baby finds their rhythm differently. If they aren't rolling or reaching by these benchmarks, it doesn't mean something is wrong—it just means they might benefit from a gentle assessment to see if they need more support with motor skills.

6-12 Months: Mobility and Meaning

Movement becomes purposeful, and social communication starts to take shape.

What to observe: Can they sit up or crawl? Are they exploring objects with their hands and mouth? Do they react to their name or begin to mimic sounds (like "mama" or "dada")?
The Supportive Perspective: This is a time of big exploration. If your child seems disinterested in their surroundings or isn't attempting to move or vocalize, treat it as a conversation starter with your pediatrician to ensure they have the tools they need to explore the world safely.

12-18 Months: The Independence Phase

Your child is likely starting to assert their independence through movement and the first seeds of language.

What to observe: Are they standing or starting to walk? Do they point to things they want? Do they follow simple instructions like "give me the ball"?
The Supportive Perspective: Communication is evolving here. If they aren't pointing or seem unable to understand simple requests, it’s okay to ask, "How can we help them bridge this gap?" It’s about building their confidence, not labeling their delays.

18-24 Months: Social and Complex Growth

This is a period of rapid development in play, social interaction, and vocabulary.

What to observe: Are they putting two words together? Do they engage in simple pretend play? Can they interact with other children, even if just in parallel play?
The Supportive Perspective: If your child is struggling to connect or communicate, remember that you are their best advocate. Seeking support at this stage is just another way of ensuring your child has the most inclusive, supportive environment possible.

Navigating the growth of your child—especially when they have different needs—can be overwhelming, but you are not alone in this. I talk more about these "invisible" moments, the struggle of advocacy, and finding joy in the journey on the Invisibly Visible podcast.

https://developingchild.harvard.edu/

https://pathways.org/

https://www.cdc.gov/act-early/milestones/index.html

The Power of Sharing and Strategies to Reclaiming Your Role, Managing Guilt, and Finding Your Village

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Wed, 01 Jul 2026 02:07:41 GMT

Being a parent to a child with a rare condition, who is medically fragile, or who has special needs is a whole other ballgame. It can feel deeply isolating, stressful, and overwhelming—but it is also profoundly empowering, unique, and remarkable. If you are currently feeling like you are navigating this journey on your own, I want you to know one thing: You don’t have to.

The reality of our lives often feels hidden from the rest of the world. We live in a landscape of medical appointments, insurance calls, and complex care plans that others simply don't see. But while these tasks define our schedules, they do not have to define our identity.

We are the heartbeat, the advocates, and the steady presence our children rely on. Reclaiming your identity starts with the simple, yet profound realization that your needs, your voice, and your well-being are not 'extra'—they are essential.

Whether you are in the thick of a crisis, navigating the quiet, somewhere in between, or simply trying to find a moment of peace, this page is designed to be your compass. Here, we move beyond the medical jargon and the 'parent-as-manager' label to get back to the core of what it means to be a family, how to hold onto your own identity in the process, and why you deserve to be seen, supported, and celebrated.

At Invisibly Visible, we believe that connection is the solution to isolation. This isn’t just about surviving the day or keeping it all "together." It’s about sharing our experiences to build a foundation of resilience, hope, and community. Whether you are seeking tools to reclaim your role as a parent, trying to cope with your internal struggles, or looking for real-world advice on navigating friendships, these strategies will guide you and bring balance back into your life.

Below, we’ve gathered the resources and reflections you need to move from surviving to thriving.

1. Parenting, Not Case Managing: 5 Strategies to Reclaim Your Role

It’s easy for the line between "parent" and "care coordinator" to blur. When your day is filled with appointments, therapies, and medical logistics, the act of parenting—the moments of connection, play, and simple presence—can often take a backseat. This post explores practical, actionable strategies to help you step back into your role as a parent, ensuring you are nurturing your child’s spirit and your own, rather than just managing their care.

- [Read here for the 5 strategies to reclaim your role

2. Managing 'Mom Guilt' and How It Is a Sign of Deep Connection

That nagging feeling that you aren’t "doing enough" or "fighting hard enough" is a heavy burden, but it’s one that almost every parent in our community carries. Instead of viewing Mom Guilt as a personal failing, let’s reframe it: it is often the direct result of how deeply you care for your child. In this section, we dismantle the guilt, explore why it persists, and learn how to transform it into self-compassion and validation.

3. Navigating Friendships and Finding Your Village (or Lack Thereof)

Isolation is perhaps the most significant challenge we face. It’s hard to find people who "get it"—people who don't just sympathize, but who truly understand the rhythm of your life. This cluster covers the reality of building a support system, the heartbreak of losing friendships that no longer fit, and the power of finding a village that sees you for who you are, not just what you manage.

Click here to read about the impact caregiving had on my marriage

You Are Not Alone in This Journey

Invisibly Visible was created because your story matters. You are doing the hard work, and you deserve a community that acknowledges it. What is one thing you wish more people understood about your life as a parent? Leave a comment or story below to join the IV League community.

Child Development & Early Intervention

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Wed, 01 Jul 2026 01:12:48 GMT

Every child develops at their own pace—but when you're a parent, it's hard not to compare. Maybe another child is talking before yours, or walking sooner, and suddenly you're wondering if you should be worried. Those questions can feel overwhelming. The good news is that developmental milestones are meant to guide conversations, not create fear.

I know that feeling of checking the chart, scrolling through the milestone lists, and feeling that quiet anxiety bubble up. I’ve been there. As parents, we often find ourselves wondering if our child is "on track." We compare, we Google, we ask friends, and sometimes we quietly worry. Every child develops at their own pace, influenced by their personality, environment, opportunities for learning, and individual strengths. Developmental milestones are simply guideposts that help us understand how children grow and learn over time—not a checklist they must complete by a specific date.

At Invisibly Visible, we believe every child deserves to be seen for who they are, not just measured against a chart. Milestones are important, but so is understanding the whole child in front of you.

What to Expect

Developmental milestones are skills and behaviours that most children achieve within a general age range. These can include physical skills such as rolling, walking, and climbing, communication skills like babbling and speaking, as well as social, emotional, and cognitive development. While milestones help identify patterns of growth, there is often a window of time a skill is expected to learnt. Some children may walk earlier and talk later, while others may excel in communication before mastering physical skills.

Rather than focusing on whether your child is exactly where a chart says they "should" be, focus on whether they are continuing to learn, grow, and engage with the world around them. Development is not always linear, and progress can happen in bursts.

Everyday Routines Through Play

One of the most powerful ways children learn is through play. Play is not separate from learning—it is learning. Through everyday experiences, children build language, problem-solving skills, emotional regulation, social understanding, and confidence. Research consistently shows that play supports healthy cognitive, emotional, social, and physical development.

The good news is that you don't need expensive toys or structured activities to support your child's development.

Simple opportunities can include:

Reading books together and talking about the pictures
Singing songs during bath time or car rides
Building towers with blocks
Playing pretend with stuffed animals
Exploring outdoors and talking about what you see
Involving your child in everyday household routines

These moments may seem small, but they are often where the most meaningful learning happens. Children learn best through relationships, connection, and opportunities to explore. Most importantly, remember that seeking support is not a reflection of your parenting. It is an act of advocacy.

At Invisibly Visible, we know that behind every milestone chart is a child with their own unique story. Whether your child is meeting milestones right on schedule, taking a different path, or navigating additional challenges, their worth is not measured by a timeline.

Keep observing. Keep listening. Keep celebrating progress, no matter how small. Whatever path your child is on, you aren't walking it alone. This is a safe space and we’re in this together, and I’m so glad you’re here.

Because every child deserves to be seen.

How I've learned to optimize the Digital Marketing Landscape

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Sat, 27 Jun 2026 21:48:18 GMT

Introduction

Rajnish Narayanan presented his seminar regarding the Digital Marketing Landscape. He provided a vital framework, but my takeaways went beyond the technical. I realized that for Invisibly Visible, digital marketing is not just a collection of platforms; it is a bridge. It is the tactical framework that allows my mission—supporting parents of medically fragile or special needs children—to travel from my heart to those who feel isolated, stressed, or unheard. The seminar pushed me to shift my perspective from reactive posting to structured, intentional strategic planning, realizing that the "how" of implementation is just as important as the "why" of my podcast.

Shifting from Execution to Strategic Thinking

The distinction between strategy and tactics was my most significant realization. Previously, I viewed marketing through the lens of individual tasks—posting a graphic or setting up a reel. However, I now understand that executing without a "digital marketing blueprint" is like trying to navigate the complex journey of parenting a child with special needs without a support network; it is exhausting and often aimless. Strategic thinking is the key to awareness. To successfully reach parents who feel they are "not fighting hard enough," I must define my goals, understand their emotional landscape, and align every piece of content with the objective of building connection. Strategic implementation means that my efforts to provide hope are not just "content"—they are deliberate steps to reduce isolation.

This visual shows the process shifting to strategic thinking and planning.

The Role of Data in Decision-Making

I used to view data as purely quantitative information on spreadsheets that look overwhelming and confusing. Now, I see it as an essential tool to evaluate what you have done, where you are going, and what needs to be changed. Tracking impressions and reach isn't just about vanity metrics; it is about measuring the efficacy of my mission. If I want to foster a safe environment where listeners feel "heard and understood," I need to know if my content is actually landing in front of those who need it. However, I recognize the analytical tension here: while data informs me if I am reaching an audience, it cannot tell me how that parent feels. A balance is necessary—I must use quantitative metrics to ensure my brand awareness strategies are working, while remaining deeply rooted in the qualitative, human stories that define Invisibly Visible.

This is a screenshot of The Invisibly Visible Blog on Hupspot, showing views over time and posts by total views.

Adapting to the Influence of AI

The discussion on AI—specifically the evolution from SEO to AEO—was a turning point. Initially, I felt overwhelmed by the technicality, but I now see AI as a way to streamline the "how" of implementation. If AI can help me structure my content so that a stressed, time-poor parent can find answers quickly, then it is a vital asset for my mission. I’ve realized that resisting these tools is a disservice to the community I’m trying to build. My goal now is to master the "how"—the technical implementation—so I can spend more of my energy on what truly matters: storytelling and connection.

This is a visual describing the process of how using AI can streamline work flows, creating more time for individual storytelling and brand development.

Conclusion

This seminar reshaped my understanding of marketing from a technical obligation to a strategic necessity. I now see that my ability to implement successfully—to truly know the tools—is a direct reflection of my commitment to the families I serve. Moving forward, my analytical focus will be on bridging the gap between my intention (empowering families) and my impact (awareness/reach). I am moving from simply sharing content to building a strategic, sustainable ecosystem where isolation is replaced by connection.

This is a visual process map describing the importance of having a strategic digital marketing blueprint and making data informed decisions for the best optimization of your brand.

Intro and my why

Parenting, not only case managing: 5 strategies to reclaim your role

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Wed, 17 Jun 2026 01:55:50 GMT

Your calendar is colour-coded. There are therapy appointments, assessment forms, insurance paperwork, phone calls, and emails waiting for replies. Somewhere between advocating for your child and coordinating services, you realize something—you haven't simply been parenting. You've become the case manager. Many of us become what I call the "Invisible Coordinator"—the person behind the scenes managing appointments, paperwork, funding applications, assessments, and communication between professionals.

I have said so many times that I can’t count, that I just want to feel like her Mom and not her Case Manager. The reality is that you often become both. Some days, the case manager role takes up so much space that it becomes difficult to simply be Mom.

The amount of paperwork that comes along with getting a new diagnosis can definitely feel overwhelming. I know that I felt like there were so many different applications, and they all have their fancy acronyms which then takes on a whole other language that only us “explicit members” to the club understand and use without skipping a beat. You are absolutely your child’s best advocate and sometimes that seems harder than it should, unfair and unjust. And you are not a “bad parent” for feeling this way- your feelings are valid. I hear you, I see you.

Here are 5 strategies that I found helped me stay organized, prepared and gave me the ability to have more time to be her Mom.

1. GET ORGANIZED

Binders/Folders and more folders.

I went on an organizational shopping binge to try to sort through the pile and find my kitchen counter again, and to get the forms before they ended up having some sort of sticky or wet spot. Binders with tabs with page protectors. I divided up by themes, I also recommend the binder style with a zipper so loose pages don’t fall out, and they hold way more! I sorted the binder with these sub-headings

Funding
Education
Medical
Assessments
Other

I created folders on my desktop and saved to the cloud so I had info whether I was home or not. These folders also had sub headings which included docs about

Important phone numbers- name and number of doctors, specialists, resources, Ministry of Children,Community and Social Services, daycare or school. I also had a printed version on my fridge in case of emergency or a Grandparent needed them (let’s face it, in this club we don’t usually hire the babysitter down the street)

2. BUILD YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM

DELIGATE!

Delegating wasn't easy for me. Like many parents, I felt guilty asking for help. But I eventually realized that accepting support didn't make me less capable—it gave me more capacity to show up for my daughter.

Read here for more about the Power of Sharing your Story

I can’t express enough how important this one is (and should be number one, but in order to delegate you need to get organized….) Whatever tasks you feel you can pass off, do it to lessen your load. I know sometimes asking for help is hard and sometimes you don’t have a large village to ask for help, but get creative and try. If you have a partner, don’t try to share the work equally, sometimes divide and conquer is a way to feel accomplished and not carry the ‘mental load’ of all things to get done (one person in charge of cooking for the week, one person in charge of pick-up or drop-off for the week, one person in charge of household tasks for the week.

If the budget allows, I can’t stress enough how much delivery services have helped. One of the positive things that came out of COVID 19. Paying for a yearly grocery deliver service pays off in my time and capacity load (can do an order waiting at doctor’s office, at night once kids asleep and the store is closed, waiting in the car at school pick-up, etc)

If you have access to respite funding, use it for respite! Sometimes having a house cleaner, or someone who can cut the lawn, allows you the time and energy to be able to be the best parent you can. I often used that time to take my daughter to the park or visiting an EarlyON centre. I wanted to make sure I was still being her Mom and having experiences other then being the “Invisible Coordinator”

3. PERMISSION TO CARE FOR YOU

The saying is true you can’t pour from an empty cup. If you aren’t taking care of your physical and mental health, the whole team suffers. It’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling that taking a break is being “unproductive”, it’s definitely a mindshift for most parents. Give yourself grace, compassion, and the space to do something you enjoy—whether it’s finding a moment of relaxation or simply a distraction from the complexities of parenting a child with special needs.

4. CREATE A SNAPSHOT OF YOUR CHILD

One of the most helpful tools I created was a one-page summary that lived at the front of my binder. Instead of searching through reports or trying to remember details during appointments, I had everything I needed in one place.

My summary page included:

Diagnosis and key medical information
Current medications
Names and contact information for specialists
Emergency contacts
Funding programs and case numbers
School and therapy providers
Important goals and support needs

Not only did this make appointments less stressful, but it also allowed grandparents, respite workers, or other caregivers to quickly understand my daughter's needs without me having to explain everything from scratch.

Having this information organized in one place helped me feel more prepared, reduced the mental load of constantly remembering details, and gave me more energy to focus on being present as her Mom.

5. YOU ARE NOT ALONE

Leverage Child Development Resource Centres for Shared Coordination.

You don't have to be the only advocate of your child's journey. Engaging with child development resource centres can be a game-changer. These centres often act as hubs, connecting you with services, therapists, and peer support groups that can naturally take on some of the coordinating heavy lifting. By plugging into their programs, you aren't just accessing care; you are shifting the responsibility of navigating services onto an established network, allowing you to step back from the 'Invisible Coordinator' role and simply show up as the parent.

You don't have to choose between being organized and being present. The goal isn't to stop advocating, it's to create enough space that you can laugh, play, celebrate milestones, and simply enjoy being together.

Because your child doesn't just need someone to coordinate services.

Remember, your child needs you to be their parent far more than they need you to be their coordinator—so give yourself permission to step back, breathe, and simply show up for the moments that truly matter.

I still have days where I feel more like a coordinator than a Mom. The paperwork doesn't disappear, the appointments don't stop, and the advocacy never fully ends.

But I've learned that I don't have to carry it all alone.

Every system I create, every task I delegate, and every moment I choose to care for myself creates more space for what matters most—being her Mom.

And at the end of the day, that's the role she needs from me the most.

I talk more about these 'invisible' moments on the Invisibly Visible podcast. If you’ve felt that spark of recognition today, I’d love for you to like, subscribe and join our IV League.

Click here for more self-help resources and ideas

Click here for how the impact of caregiving affects your relationships

Click here to read my story of trusting your gut and the importance of following your Mother's Instinct

The Invisibly visible life....and why I started this podcast

ivpodcast@invisiblyvisible.net (Alison Smith) — Sat, 30 May 2026 02:31:28 GMT

Hi, my name is Alison, and I created Invisibly Visible to be a supportive space for parents, grandparents, caregivers, and friends navigating the challenges of raising children with exceptionalities.

Creating this podcast is one of the most vulnerable things I have ever done. I know so many of you have walked a similar path—or may be walking it right now—living a life you never imagined for yourself or your family. I understand what it feels like to be lost, overwhelmed, and unsure where to turn. My hope is to remind listeners that they can do hard things, while also offering grace, building self-compassion along the way.

Invisibly Visible has become a purpose close to my heart: helping families feel seen, heard, and less alone. Through this podcast, I’ll share conversations and stories about surviving and thriving in parenthood while raising children with exceptionalities. My goal is to help build a community rooted in connection, resilience, and advocacy. And while this journey can be incredibly heavy, I also believe it’s important to laugh, find joy, and make room for moments of lightness along the way.

This first episode offers a snapshot of who I am—not only as a mother, but also as a professional in early childhood education and child development. Those roles have deeply intertwined throughout my journey. Having lived experience alongside education and professional training has given me strength, insight, and determination to support both my own family and the families I have had the privilege to serve.

I have always wanted to work with children. My first job was as a camp leader when I was 13 years old. I later graduated with honors from the Early Childhood Education program at Niagara College and knew I wanted to keep growing in my ability to support children and families. In 2006, I was part of the first graduating class of the Autism and Behavioral Sciences program at St. Lawrence College. Over the years, I have worked as an early childhood educator, instructor therapist, resource consultant, family services coordinator, and infant development consultant.

Through both my personal and professional experiences, I have learned that strategies that may seem simple on paper can feel incredibly hard for families living through sleepless nights, tantrums, self-injurious behaviors, burnout, and endless mom guilt. I have had to learn when to quiet the behavior therapist in me and simply be Mom. More than anything, I believe empathy and compassion are essential. Sometimes, feeling understood is what gives us the strength to keep going.

I am also a mom to three wonderful children, who are now 17, 15, and 13. I believe deeply in serendipity, intuition, and the signs that guide us when we need them most. All three of my children have faced more than their share of trauma and hardship. My youngest, Olivia, shines brightly and has grown into a strong, resilient, and passionate young woman. Olivia has a rare genetic deletion called 1q21.1. At this point, I know so much medical jargon that you might think I’m a general practitioner.

Throughout this podcast, I will share personal stories and reflections from my journey as a parent to a child with a rare condition and from the experience of watching her feel invisibly visible in the world around her. I don’t have all the answers, and I would never pretend to understand every path a parent of a child with special needs may face. But I do know isolation, confusion, frustration, joy, resilience, and hope.

That hope is what I want to offer you.

I want you to know that you and your child are not invisible. I see you. I hear you. And through this space, I hope we can continue learning, connecting, building resilience, and advocating for a more inclusive world—together.

Looking for more resources? Check out Child Development & Early Intervention

The power of sharing- you can't do it alone. Tried and true tips and tricks